FREE CANDY (2011)

 Addictive Personality

Cursed with an addictive personality

Everything I do I have to do excessively

Give me a taste I turn into a fiend

It's all or nothing man I've got no in between

I'm out of control, I've got no accountability

Woe is me, I'm a victim of my own mentality

Straight bent seven nights out of the week

I only put the bottle down when it's time to go to sleep

I wake and bake, twist up the whole eighth

Blow it straight to the face with no thought to the waste

I'm a gluttonous man when I'm sitting in the black

And when I blow it all I'm steady scheming how to get it back

And tell me, tell me, tell me why no drink can quench this thirst of mine

It's insatiable, I eat my fill and I'm never full

And I try Lord I try, but there's just no escape

Cause every vice I put down leaves another one right in its place

I guess I'm

Cursed with an addictive personality

Everything I do, I have to do excessively

Give me a taste I turn into a fiend

It's all or nothing man I've got no in between

Put it all on black and hope for the best

It's in fate's hands now, there's no time to double guess

The wheel stops spinning, for a minute I'm alive

And then I'm broke again, I have begun to realize

One day my sins will pick up their pace

The music that I write I will one day face

Tomorrow's burden has no place in the light of this day

I'm in denial and I wouldn't have it another way

And tell me tell me tell me when I'll ever feel this free again

The older we get the more we obsess

The things we owe begin to own us

I live for the moment try not to act my age

Social norms make such a confining cage

We're on borrowed time and I have come to find

I am

Cursed with an addictive personality

Everything I do, I have to do excessively

Give me a taste I turn into a fiend

It's all or nothing man I've got no in between

 Well

Cursed with an addictive personality

Everything I do, I have to do excessively

Give me a taste I turn into a fiend

It's all or nothing man I've got no in between

I'm cursed with an addictive personality

Everything I do, I have to do excessively

Give me a taste I turn into a fiend

It's all or nothing man I've got no in between

*

Type B

You sit around and you count your bills

You calculate how they convert to thrills

You lose yourself in all those pills

And well my friend, they'll never warm your chills

But I once knew a fellow with a keen way of thinking

Lost in the dice he was rolling and the spirits he was drinking

He always had a smile on his face

But I knew about the demons he had dwelling deep inside

Never wanted shit, no matter how much he lied

I knew his existence was a waste

What a fucking waste

You spend your days getting numb

Swear it's straight despite what you've become

My advice is follow crumbs

And find a trail back from what you've become

But I once knew a fellow with a keen way of thinking

Lost in the dice he was rolling and the spirits he was drinking

He always had a smile on his face

But I knew about the demons he had dwelling deep inside

Never wanted shit, and no matter how much he lied

I knew his existence was a waste

What a fucking waste

But I once knew a fellow with a keen way of thinking

Lost in the dice he was rolling and the spirits he was drinking

He always had a smile on his face

But I knew about the demons he had dwelling deep inside

Never wanted shit no matter how much he lied

I knew his existence was a waste

What a fucking waste

*

Hallucinations

I really not exceptional, I'm pretty average I must say

My attention's always deficit but my life resides in the grey

And I rarely follow through but my intentions they are pure

I've had my heart broken and I've broken some before

My friends are far from perfect but they back me in this war

I may not always have a bed but I will always have a floor

Sometimes I try to predict how the future will unfold

Then I realize I don’t care, it will far more fun to be old

These hallucinations, they're whiskey induced

And I... am looking for an answer that needs no proof

So I'll play the game, though I hate all the rules

And I, I got nothing, so I got nothing to lose

Fight my own inadequacies; they consume me I cannot break free

My mom always told me to believe so I'll just breathe, wait and see

Because there's always someone cooler, there is always someone better

Always gonna be a cat that makes a little bit more cheddar

But that's okay with me, that's just the way it is

One day I will be dead and all this shit will be relative

Because a boy is born, grows into a man, dreams are stepped on by anyone who can

I'm showing anyone my backhand, fuck the naysayers, stickin to my plan

These hallucinations, they're whiskey induced

And I... am looking for an answer that needs no proof

So I'll play the game though I hate all the rules

And I, I got nothing so I got nothing to lose

(Dubby)

These hallucinations, they are whiskey induced

But but I I I I I am looking for answers that need no proof

And I will play the game though I hate all the rules

Because I I I I I got nothing to lose... nothing to lose... I got nothing to lose... nothing nothing nothing I got nothing to lose... nothing to lose... I got nothing to lose...nothing nothing nothing I got nothing to lose... yeaaaaaaa ya.

* 

Tomorrow

A dollar saved is a dollar that's earned

We all know that expression and the lesson is never learned

Caught up in the moment and our foresight is deficit

Forget the money when we're drinkin and next morning we got less of it

But now I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm trying to figure out where all my money went

I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm trying to figure out to who it was leant

I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm trying to figure out on what it was spent

But then the headache kicks in and we start to repent

Remembering the bills we gotta pay and what that money meant

But there's no use in moaning we will do it again

Buying ten dollar shots for all of our friends

Put your weight on your feet, your glasses in the air

Put your bottoms up and we will drown all our cares

And we'll worry about tomorrow when it gets here

We'll worry about tomorrow when it comes...when it comes

This bar's a battlefield

And now my wallets losing the war to my liver

This bar is a battlefield

And now my brain is losing the war to the organ I want to give her

Sometimes I'm having problems telling if the bottle is half empty or half full

But I'm going to remove all remaining doubt with one final pull

But now I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm trying to figure out where all my money went

I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm trying to figure out to who it was leant

I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm tryin I'm trying to figure out on what it was spent

But then the headache kicks in and we start to repent

Remembering the bills we gotta pay and what that money meant

But there's no use in moaning we will do it again

Buying ten dollar shots for all of our friends

Put your weight on your feet, your glasses in the air

Put your bottoms up and we will drown all our cares

And we'll worry about tomorrow when it gets here

We'll worry about tomorrow when it comes

We're going to worrrry about tomorrow when it gets here

We're going to worry worry worry gonna worry about tomorrow...We will worry worry worry about tomorrow when it gets here

Get this monkey off my back, he's playing drums on top my head

Want so badly just to sleep, I want so bad to rest my head

I just need one more little drink so I won’t feel so upset

I just need one more little hit, just need one more cigarette

Cause I can’t seem to forget this vice that I regret

I just need one more cigarette, I just need one more cigarette

Ohhhh yeah yeah yeah

* 

Mistaken

I like to believe in the kindness of strangers

Even though this world is filled with inescapable dangers

Where caution is a must and you can't tell who you can trust

So disregard my first remark despite what we have just discussed

Not enough love, a little too much lust

I've done away with the bourgeoisie, stuck with the upper crust

Human decency is tarnished, someone get the varnish

Help me get rid of this rust

One day soon I will be dead

Not another thought running though my head

And sometimes the beauty overtakes me

But then I feel I'm mistaken

How mistaken... yeahhhhhhh

I look around, all I see is sin

It is tearing me up, consuming me from within

It breeds overwhelming sadness, I'm slipping into madness

And you want to hear me, here's my theory, listen to this

A little more thought could lead to bliss

Recognize the truth for lies that got more holes than swiss

I not sayin' I'm exonerated, I'm really not that educated

Don't interrogate me, I'm taking the fifth

Because

One day soon I will be dead

Not another thought running though my head

And sometimes the beauty overtakes me

But then I feel I'm mistaken

How mistaken... yeahhhhhhh

One day soon I will be dead

Not another thought running though my head

And sometimes beauty overtakes me

But then I feel I'm mistaken

How mistaken... Oh oh oh yeah yeah

* 

Burn My Candle

I guess I'm blessed

Lord knows I've got a lot

But I've got no time and I've got no clue

And I want to strike now while the iron's hot

I've got questions

But I don’t think an answers coming

Every road that I seem to take

Takes me further from the summit

Because I'm deaf and I'm blind

But I venture on while I wake

After all, the only shots that you're guaranteed to miss

Are the ones that you never take

So I'll keep burning this candle

From every possible every possible way

Cause I don't want to smell the roses for the first time

Down, down, down at the bottom of my grave

Crystal ball, I don't got one

I don't know what the future holds

But the mystery means more to me

Than the final lines in an average story

Maybe the footprints I make will stay

Or maybe the tides will wash them away

Maybe I'll be a merchant of the world

And the melodies I write will be my trade

Or maybe I'll have a family

Two little ones who love me so

Spend my final days in a rocking chair

Going back and forth while I watch the grass grow

So I'll keep burning this candle

From every possible every possible way

Cause I don't want to smell the roses for the first time

Down, down, down at the bottom of my grave

*

Woman’s Sin

You don't gotta call me names

I am well aware of the conflict that I've caused

And I'm sorry for everything I did to you

You know I did not mean to prove any of the stereotypes you choose to

Lose yourself in

With thought of what is happening

Is just the next time that you trust

The first time or one thousand

Cause you're lost now in the deep end

Having trouble breathing

The hypocrisy is the cost we must pay for this to happen

And I don’t regret a single thing I said

All this bullshit is in your head

Realize this before you begin

Behind every broken man is a woman's sin

And I used to believe love was all we needed

But time has passed

I've since grown conceited

Hear the demons screaming in the secrets you've been keeping

Your heart has been for sale to the lover who will speak now

It's a dangerous game we play

The only rules we have are ambiguous at best

As it seems more so than not

We fall for a facade

They find the master move

Yeh you're abominable now and asking more stuff too

This is stranger but if all would stop the game

You're a clever double agent showing clear and present danger

What happened to the promise of these extremes and keeping honest

All I get is a marionette with an open tea retainer

And I still don’t regret a single thing I said

All this bullshit is in your head bitch

Realize this before you begin

Behind every broken man is a woman's sin

And I used to believe love was all we needed

But time has passed

I've since grown conceited

Hear the demons screaming in the secrets you've been keeping

Your heart has been for sale to the lover who will speak now

And I used to believe love was all we needed

But time has passed

I've just grown conceding

Hear the demons screaming in the secrets you've been keeping

Your heart has been for sale to the lover who will speak now

*

Lie To Me

Baby everything about you is so perfect in the moment

I am really scared of knowing my infatuation's growing

If experience has taught me anything it is in fact that perfection is just a myth

The only place that it exists is fairy tales and dreams of bliss

I guess I'm happiest when falling cause it's stalling reality

When I hit the ground my problems they are waiting there for me

But I am not naive, its fate and I won’t try to fight

Baby, all I ask of you is let's not deal with this tonight

Please lie to me if that's what it takes to get me asleep

Ignorance is bliss and that is what I think

I'll do anything to remain in this dream

In this dream

Please lie to me if that's what it takes to get me asleep

Ignorance is bliss and that is what I think

I'll do anything to remain in this dream

In this dream

It's like I'm chasing a lie while you bask in the truth

Like I'm Ponce De Leone, you're the fountain of youth

Like this crutch that holds me up is really a noose

Sometimes I feel like Clark Kent without a telephone booth

But it's not a lie if ain't spoken out loud

So I hold 'em in and swallow it down

The shit I hide from my peers I'll scream at a crowd

After all it ain’t a family if I'm never around

It's like I'm speaking of love and never knew what it was

The Virgin Mary crying tears of blood

Happiness I can't find in a drug

It ain't right but God dammit if it ain't fun

It's like I'm over my head, I'm sinking just like a stone

Driving round with no direction home

Ten long years and I still haven't grown

That shit follows me every place that I go... so

Please lie to me if that's what it takes to get me asleep

Ignorance is bliss and that is what I think

I'll do anything to remain in this dream

In this dream

Please lie to me if that's what it takes to get me asleep

Ignorance is bliss and that is what I think

I'll do anything to remain in this dream

In this dream

 (Interlude)

 So lie to me if that's what it takes to get me asleep

Ignorance is bliss and that is what I think

I'll do anything to remain in this dream

In this dream

Please lie to me if that's what it takes to get me asleep

Ignorance is bliss and that is what I think

I'll do anything to remain in this dream

In this dream

(Repeat to end)

*

Nine Words

I've been coming around here for years

The furniture's moved but the same faces still appear

I can tell my calendar days by the prices that they set on the domestic beer

Now farewells are becoming an acquired taste

The mayor has been presenting an unfamiliar face

I can no longer disguise the surprise in my eyes

I guess I did not expect to end up in this place

Of what is expected that really occurs

Decisions dissected still doesn't reverse

Try not to resist, stare down the abyss

Let yourself fall to see what truly exists

Hopefully you find

That which you desire

But if love is what you need my dear

Here is what I require

Give me just nine words before we fall

Love my faults or don’t love me at all

Because the man you care deeply for today

Isn't long for this world

And tomorrow he'll become just another victim of change

Change

You see I tried my best to stay the same

I failed but I took it in a different way

You see there's no escape from your date with fate

You always pay but the bitch is never late

So embrace it, enjoy it, don't waste it, I implore you

There no sweating what you cannot help

You're just not selling what's not on the shelf

Don’t stress it too hard or you'll lose yourself

And give me just nine words before we fall

Love my faults or don’t love me at all

Because the man you care deeply for today

Isn't long for this world

And tomorrow he'll become just another victim of change

Change

Give me just nine words before we fall

Love my faults or don’t love me at all

Because the man you care deeply for today

Isn't long for this world

And tomorrow he'll become just another victim of change

*

Instead

It's time to let go so the music can flow

Though our souls show us things that we already know

Yo, as a matter of fact, my logic is cracked

And my hand ain’t that great but I think the deck is stacked

You only live once so we'll play it anyway

Put our chips in the middle of the river gets us paid

Worst case scenario, we'll lose our dinero

We'll turn up the stereo we're past the point of caring so

If I can’t have love

I'll love what I have instead

And if I can't have love

I'll love what I have instead

And now I'm left spinning like a spider in the breeze

Yo I can't stop sinning, that's where I got a disease

Cannot afford a vaccine due to medical fees

So I'll keep on relaxing ‘til it brings me to my knees

Life is too short to get caught up in stress

Double guessing is in fact the cost of progress

So I'll just keep being me, dot my I's, cross my T's

Hope for the best but enjoy what is free

Cause

If I can’t have love

I'll love what I have instead

And if I can't have love

I'll love what I have instead

Because my eyes are open now that I'm without you

And I'll pour myself another drink, I've had too few

This life is just a game but it is one I refuse

tooooo lose

If I can’t have love

I'll love what I have instead

And if I can't have love

I'll love what I have instead

If I can’t have love

I'll love what I have instead

And if I can't have love

I'll love what I have instead

* 

Bay Ride

Back in the day we were driving on the bay

We were drinking the brews, we were grooving on the waves yeah

Those were the days

Sparking up Js and 40 ounces to play

Watch the sunset on the river, listen to someone say

These are the days

We had no reality and it is so plain to me that

These are the best days of our lives

We'd smoke a blunt or three and then we would start to see that

Everything is nothing when you've got nothing to do

The price of the rickey always made me suspicious

Paying ten for a handle means it's definitely not delicious, yeah

That's just how we do

But it always did the trick it would get us there quick

Even if the next day it left us feeling little sick

That's just how we do

We had no reality and it is so plain to me that

These are the best days of our live

We'd smoke a blunt or three and then we would start to see that

Everything is nothing when you've got nothing to do

Diggity diggity dak is the sound that your chest makes

When your heart's out of control substandard cardiac arrest

Your mind is double guessing whether it can pass the test

But will you be exceptional or will you fall back with the rest

Your momma's calling you and saying come back to the nest

It's time to give it up you know you failed in that conquest

But now I'm gonna spit some truth, so to you I must confess

But your compulsion is a mess and you can't cut it with the best

I've got no reality and it's so plain to me that

These are the best days of our lives

We'd smoke a blunt or three and then we would start to see that

Everything is nothing when you've got nothing to do

Here's my philosophy, gonna twist up a little tree

Spark it up, quickly absorb it to my body

There's not much time for me, here comes responsibility

I better live all of this up while I can

We'd smoke a blunt or three and then we would start to see that

Everything is nothing when you've got nothing to do

*

Stories

Yesterday I took a trip down memory lane

Fungally releasing all the catacombs in my brain

The lame to the insane and the mundane to the tame

So sit back and listen up to the stories of my membrane

I cracked my first big wheel at the age of three

14 years later put my whip around a tree

And I'm not the best driver, ask anyone I know

I'd rather sit back and besides you while I'm puffin on some dro

Wrote my first rhyme at the age of nine

14 years later playing shows all the time

I got metaphors galore, my words are always flowing

And every day that passes my abilities are growing

And you don't understand me

I don’t have a clue

And I'm sorry about the miscommunication

But I'm gonna clear it up for you

One shot, two shot, three shots, four

Put another back and I'm lying on the floor

Started all the madness at the age of 13

And now my favorite supplement is just a vitamin, agave

16 I got my first slice of pie

Look at me now, yo I'm telling all these lies

You all think I'm sweet, you all think I'm nice

Til I hit em in the eyes with my creamy surprise

And you don't understand me

I don’t have a clue

And I'm sorry about the miscommunication

But I'm gonna clear it up for you

Well I got 24 behind, me here's to 24 more

With tales to tell, stories to report

All the chances I take that lead to mistakes

Because life is all about the memories you make

And you don't understand me

I don’t have a clue

And I'm sorry about the miscommunication

But I'm gonna clear it up for you

*

Mundane

We call it reality but what's so real about it?

Creativity's been butchered I scream and shout it

And I get crazy looks during commercial breaks

From the zombified masses in a state half awake

Well they are not quite alive, not quite dead

Learning their opinions from something someone else said

An identity crisis, define me, define me

Accept me, dissect me, assign me, assign me

In an empty world where shells remain

Some people find religion trying to ease that pain

Others of us put whiskey through our veins

One fact remains

We are all mundane

Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Regurgitating news while I regurgitate in my mouth

Optimism's a pipe dream when all you know is doubt

Because while knowledge is power and ignorance is bliss

I find my only answers at the bottom of a fifth

Fight and flight, they're all the same choice

When you're living in a system that has swallowed your voice

Liberty's been cracked, that bell ain't ringing

But if I'm going down, son I'm going down swinging

In an empty world where shells remain

Some people find religion trying to ease that pain

Others of us put whiskey through our veins

One fact remains

We are all mundane

In an empty world where shells remain

Some people find religion trying to ease that pain

Others of us put whiskey through our veins

One fact remains

We are all mundane

*

Chesapeake

Its turbulent tonight on the Chesapeake

And I'm watching the rain fall endlessly

Mother Nature won't you cleanse me please

Wash away this reality

I've always felt more awake in dreams

Can never quite tell just what it means

Nightmares haunt my consciousness

Dreams must be my sweet release

Well, easy come is easy go

I don't know much but that is one thing I have grown to know

Happiness is relative

My reserves are spent I ain’t got nothing left I can afford to give

Blistered hands, my feet are sore

When it rains you know it pours

Ohhhh, got nothing left to give

The wind is dancin' through the treetops

Whitecaps are crashing now and they never stop

Thunder bellows through the midnight sky

Lightning crashes right before my eyes

Easy come is easy go

I don't know much but that is one thing I have grown to know

Happiness is relative

My reserves are spent I ain’t got nothing left I can afford to give

Blistered hands, my feet are sore

When it rains you know it pours

Ohhhh, got nothing left to give

 *

 They Remain

I'm chasing a vision through much opposition

Recording decisions in an old composition

Quietly wishing, I keep double fisting

Failure is all with the scene

My mom thinks I'm crazy

My dad thinks I'm lazy

My future is hazy

I don’t let it phase me

They know they raised me

To look past what pays me

Find happiness somewhere within

Take the good with the bad and the bad with the worse

The first with the last and the last with the first

I always aim up but I'm usually let down

Climbing ladders just to fall to the ground

I'll keep playing songs to an empty room

Take my grain of salt rub it all in my wounds

I am gonna keep trying while there's blood in my veins

Anything worth having is worth a little pain.

So, when I'm old and this life has changed

My memories, they remain

Disregarding the bitchin of pompous musicians

Who keep on insisting this is competition

I quietly listen maintain my position

We all share the same dreams

So I reach for the stars and put safe bets on hold

Let the words Joe speaks bring peace to my soul

My future is unclear but I’m placing my bet

On the small chance of bliss over a life of regret

Take the good with the bad and the bad with the worse

The first with the last and the last with the first

I always aim up but I'm usually let down

Climbing ladders just to fall to the ground

I'll keep playing songs to an empty room

Take my grain of salt, rub it all in my wounds

I am gonna keep trying while there's blood in my veins

Anything worth having is worth a little pain

So, when I'm old and this life has changed

My memories, they remain

Yeahhhh